Thanks for the junk!

In The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren says that God never wastes a hurt. As ironic as it sounds I become more and more thankful for this everyday.

Growing up I had a fairly rough home life. I had to grow up really quickly and be my own parent most of the time. Unfortunately, some of the adults in my life didn't know how to be adults and made many bad decisions of which I often felt the consequences.

On the outside it looked like I had it all together. I was a happy kid and teenager, never rebellious or out of control. My extended family made sure that I had nice clothes, a car, a job, and a house to sleep in. They also made every effort to let me participate in the activities that my friends did (church camp, dance classes and competitions, sports). Most people never knew how poor we really were and what exactly went on at home. For the most part, I blended in at my affluent high school.

Last night Bryan called me just before I got home and asked how far away I was. About a mile from home, I pulled in the driveway just minutes before one of our students. The student had called Bryan earlier upset and needing to talk to someone. Not wanting to leave any room for question or speculation, he wanted to make sure that I was there too.

Wow, I blown away to hear the student's story. I had no idea what was going on in this kids life. Bryan was aware of the situation and had been talking with the student for a while about things. This kid is a strong leader in our group, well put together, good at school, sold out to Christ, and loves to serve. A popular kid, you would never guess what was going on behind that smile and sweet disposition.

My heart broke and I began to cry (I am not a crier). I couldn't help but think of my own teenage years. So many of the things going on were similar to situations I had dealt with in my own life and family as a high school and college student. Anyone would feel sorry for this kid, but I could completely understand what was going on inside. I had been there. Though it was probably 15 years ago when I dealt with those issues, it felt like it was happening all over again.

We didn't have a lot of answers, but we prayed and I let the student in on some of what I had been through. If nothing else, the student left knowing that they had found someone who would listen, understand, and help however possible.

God reminded me of that chapter from The Purpose Driven Life and that all those hurts in my life weren't a waste. You can't truly understand someone until you've been there. He also reminded me of what a huge responsibility we have as parents. Every decision we make not only affects us, but our children also. Exodus 34:6-7 makes it clear that our families will have to pay for our choices.

Thank you God that you don't waste those experiences. I couldn't be who I am today without those moments and I wouldn't have the opportunity to love teenagers with those hurts. It seems odd to be thankful for the junk in your life, but I wouldn't change one thing. Thanks for the junk!

Ministry Wives

I follow the Married to a Youth Pastor blog and this week a great question came up. If you had the opportunity to attend a women's Bible study, would you prefer to go to one at your own church or a different church? (You can read the original post by clicking here. ) I read the comments and then added my own. Here was my response...

First of all, I would love to be a part of a women's Bible study. I would choose one outside of my church though. My first choice would be to have a Bible study made up of pastor's wives from our area. I have been in ministry about 10 years (8 of them with my husband). Though my husband is the paid staffer, we generally serve as a team and the people in our church know that. That being said, they think that I am the inside track to the staff.

Many times when I am involved with other women at our church I get asked a million questions about private staff matters. I also get an earful about anything people aren't happy about. It is very draining and awkward. There really isn't a tactful way to tell people to mind their own business in certain situations.

Women outside of ministry don't understand the fishbowl and stress that we live under. Our whole family is on call 24/7. (Yes, we knew this was the case when we chose to follow God's call.) Often we sacrifice family time to deal with someone else's crisis. It would be such a blessing to have a connection with other women that understand the dynamics of a ministry family.

It has been my desire for quite a while to form a support team of ministry wives in our area. If anybody out there is in upstate SC look me up. I would love to get to know you!

Memphis 09

I can't believe that I am just now getting to this. Sorry! Our mission trip to Memphis was incredible as usual. God never ceases to amaze me. I took (literally) hundreds of pictures. I have included links to the pictures. ( Album 1, Album 2)You can also find them in my facebook albums. There is so much that I could share, but I will give you my highlights.

Every year as we prepare and help our students prepare, we always think about how we are going to change those children and their community. Every year God changes us! You would think that we would get it by now, but apparently we are slow learners. There was one student that we thought would be a great part of the team, so Bryan approached him about going. After some consideration (and I am sure parental consultation) he decided to go. I knew that he was afraid of kids, but thought that he would enjoy other aspects of the week. The first day he was a little reserved on the site, but he began warming up on the second day.

That night we took the team to WalMart. On the way back I heard the student talking to his parents on the phone. "I'm pretty sure I am not afraid of kids anymore." The tears began to flow as I thought about how HUGE a thing that was for him. I am tearing up now just thinking about it. God is so faithful to use us and change us to be more like Himself if we will just be willing to step outside of ourselves.

On Thursday, we were sure that our Bible Club was going to be rained out. Determined not to give up on the next to the last day (Friday was the close of the summer), our site missionary Austin, told us that we could go door to door and just talk to the kids or play with them on their porches where it was dry. Our team was so excited and immediately figured out ways to adjust their jobs for the day. After dropping our students off at various locations in the neighborhood, Bryan and I drove over to an apartment complex where we dropped some students off earlier. Some of our students were sitting in a covered area in front of one of the apartments with several kids making salvation bracelets.

The rain was letting up, so we started driving around telling our other students to come over to the apartments. Within 20 minutes or so, the rain had stopped and we had filled the parking lot with kids. There were bicycle games going on, crafts, Frisbee games, and ball games. Kids we had not seen all week were hanging out with us. Since our story that day included a gospel presentation, we didn't want to miss that opportunity. The boys leading that day, adjusted and did GREAT!!! The kids were more attentive than any other day. (If you look at the pictures you will see the apartments and some of the houses surrounding them. These apartments are luxurious compared to the rest of the neighborhood. Don't let them fool you. We are in one of the 5 poorest neighborhoods in America.)

The last thing that I want to share is probably the most important. Our kids were truly changed! There was a fire ignited in them to change their own community. Before we made it back to Powdersville they had plans and weren't going to let us talk them out of it. On Saturday, August 15th (2 weeks after our return) they got together and canvased the neighborhood around the church. They made fliers and handed them out inviting all the kids to a Saturday Bible Club at Marathon. The next Saturday 17 high school students (there were only 14 on the mission team) arrived at the church at 9:00am, prayed, walked the neighborhood collecting kids, and had a Bible club.

There were 16 kids and only one of them was a child that comes to our church. They have a club planned for one Saturday every month with hopes for more during the summer. It was a great day! The kids enjoyed it and our students did an incredible job. We were so proud of them. There were 6 or 7 adults there to help, but it was completely student led. Our students are amazing and are serious about serving their community. Several more projects are in the making, so be on the look out for more doting!

The hands and feet of Jesus, that is what our students are becoming and we couldn't be prouder!




*We made friends with some very cool Vietnamese students from Houston. (There are a lot of pictures of them as well.)

The Storm Before the Calm

Yes, you read that right...the storm before the calm, at least I hope that is what is going on. Our students camps start this Friday (Middle School Friday-Sunday and HS Sunday-Friday). Last year on the first night of HS camp Bryan and two students ended up in the ER. The next day we had one more in the ER and one at the Dr. At MS camp Bryan got bit/stung again and almost ended up in the ER.

I am hoping that yesterday's visit to the ER is making up for any at camp. Bryan often plays basketball with other staff guys and students on our new outdoor court at the church. While playing yesterday, Bryan somehow tore his calf muscle. He was in a lot of pain and afraid that he had torn his Achilles. We were in the ER for a few hours. It looked like it was going to be a fairly quick trip, but the ER doc decided to call in the orthopedic doc and it took him over an hour to get there. (Of course we had already been there over an hour when he was called.) We ended up with a pair of crutches and a couple of prescriptions.

Bryan had already been at the hospital that day visiting with our friends Chris & Kathy. They too were supposed to be a part of our HS camp. Kathy's dad is not doing well and the Dr has suggested that they not leave town.

Last year we had a lot of crazy things happen at camp, but God also showed up in ways that our kids had never experienced before. On top of the hospital issues yesterday, we had to change our camp plans three times before finalizing about 3 weeks ago (we usually have this done by January). As much as this adds to the hecticness of getting ready for camp, it excites me. Why? God is up to something. I just want to get out of the way and let Him do His thing!

Please pray for our camps and for Kathy's dad.

By the way... I have come to the conclusion that student ministry is hazardous to Bryan's health.

They Are My Students Too!

Maybe it is just me, but I feel like the students in our youth group are just as much mine as they are my husband's. Over the years, I have gotten to know many of the students and been involved in their lives. I love these kids and enjoy the time that I get to spend with them.

One of my gifts, or faults as it may be, is that I often see what people can't see in themselves. Maybe it's the mother in me or maybe it truly is a gift from God. Despite their immaturity and mistakes, it is easy for me to see what God can do with their lives. I don't mean this in a prophetic way or anything. When I see their struggles, I can just imagine the ways that God is shaping them to use that experience in the future.

Knowing what they can be makes it hard to see them fall. I know that I had to learn my lessons on my own and so do they, but that doesn't make it any easier to see them hurt. Recently a student whom we love dearly and are very close to, came to Bryan with some tough news. The student was broken and and honest. A bad decision had been made and the consequences were coming quickly. Unfortunately, the student wasn't alone in this decision or the consequences. Bryan cried with the student as they discussed the situation. When he came home and shared with me, I broke down. It broke my heart not that the student had made a bad decision, but knowing how the world would respond to this decision. I wasn't hurt or disappointed in the student, but hurting for him.

I want to shelter all of our students from the dangers of the world, but I can't. I want to guard their hearts for them, but I can't. I want to take their burdens for them, but I can't. What I can do, is love them through it and give them every chance possible to make wise decisions. I can also be an ear to listen and hands to hold as they face the consequences of their decisions.

Our challenge now is to learn how to support them and love them through these things , without down playing the seriousness of their decisions. We can't ignore their sins, but we can show them the same GRACE that our Father showed us. It is our job to be Christ to these kids and show them not how Christian's respond, but how Christ responds to their situations.

Please pray for our students. They face some huge things everyday. Our students have some heavy burdens. Pray that Christ would give us what we as a ministry team and church need to reach them and support them.

Meeting the Right Needs Part 2

"It is one thing to come and talk about things such as human rights, religion, and democracy. This only builds a foundation; people must have their needs met. What do rights and democracy mean on an empty stomach? People listen better when their stomachs are full and their basic needs are met." -President Kagame of Rwanda.

"Today it is very fashionable to talk about the poor, but it is not fashionable to talk with them." -Mother Theresa


Two years ago, Bryan and I got involved with a ministry in Memphis, TN. Brinkley Heights Church sits in the Binghampton area of Memphis. This is one of the roughest, most crime laden areas of Memphis. As the crime and poverty rates grew in the area, rather than move to a safer, more attractive area, they embraced the community. They have made it their mission to take back the neighborhood and enable the people of that community to make a difference.

The people of Brinkley Heights were the first ones I thought of when I read the quotes above. Yes, they know that Christ is the answer for their community, but they also know that they can't just walk up to the crack houses or the substandard housing developments and shove Jesus down people's throats. These people are an incredible example to anyone wanting to truly make a difference in their community.

Brinkley Heights has food ministries, clothing ministries, and educational ministries (among other things). The people of Brinkley Heights go to their neighbors and offer them groceries and shoes for their children. They offer after school tutoring and even private schooling for the children. They offer a free safe place for children, teens, and even adults to play sports. They offer them free summer child care that includes free food for the children in their very own neighborhoods.

When they become aware of needs, they bring the family to the ministry center, get their information, give them the needed food or clothes, offer them budgeting and financial planning help, and share the gospel with them. They don't walk in the door and get preached to, they get what they need and before they leave they are enabled to help themselves, and then they are prayed for and the gospel is presented. They know that most of these people will never walk through the doors of their church on a Sunday morning or Wednesday night and they don't hesitate to meet their needs. It is not about growing the numbers of the church, but meeting the physical needs of the community.

These people understand that when the physical needs are met, the people are seeing Jesus in action. They are presenting the gospel just as Jesus would have. Just as people couldn't walk away and not be changed in some way after meeting Jesus, neither can the people of Memphis. It takes a lot of faith and courage to reach out to drug dealers and gang members and the people of Brinkley Heights do it everyday. They don't discriminate, they don't judge, they just meet their needs. They are filling stomachs and meeting needs. They aren't talking about the poor, they are talking to them. They are taking back their neighborhood!

Me Being Transparent

Productivity seems to be my enemy lately. It seems like I get lazier and lazier everyday and I hate it! I would love to chalk it up to the natural aging process, but I am only 30 not 80. Honestly, sometimes I have no motivation to be productive. I would rather sit and watch TV or play computer games than anything else. I HATE, let me repeat, HATE that. There isn't enough time to waste.



Let me share just a bit of the evidence that I have become down right lazy. My house is always a wreck (really unnerving since I am a neat freak), there are about 6 or 8 unfinished projects at home (some have been unfinished for months), my quiet time is almost non existent, I have sat in one adult service since the beginning of Oct, and my prayer life stinks (it has become simply a wish list rather than a conversation).



It makes me sick to think of all the time that I waste everyday. If nothing else I could be exercising. That would help with my constant whining about my weight gain. Since I am so eager to sit on my behind, I could at least be reading my Bible or praying.



I know that this is no one's fault but my own. For several years I have longed for an accountability partner. I really do desire to have someone ask me the tough questions and challenge me. I need that. I desperately need that. At different times I have prayed for that and it never seems to happen. It is not clear to me if I am missing something, or if God is telling me to wait.



Being introverted, I think people think that I don't want to be approached. They may think that everything is ok and that I would let them know if I needed something. Unfortunately, that couldn't be more false. I am very independent and believe that I always have to appear strong and in control. This makes it nearly impossible for me to approach someone and be totally transparent about what is going on in my world. The fact that there is the holy stigma of a pastor's wife doesn't help either. I feel trapped!



Thankfully, I love to write and have always been able to express things on paper (or a computer screen) that I could never say. Usually, that never goes any further than the journal on my nightstand. This a huge step for me. Not only am I being transparent, I am putting it out there so that anyone with Internet access can read it (or at least the 20 or 30 people that read this blog regularly).



Some friends of ours just started a life group for us. They wanted to love on us. We have met only once due to the holidays, but we will meet this week. The group consists of Bryan and I and two other couples. One of these couples we have been close with for several years (we were in each others weddings) and the other couple we have known for about a year. There may be others that join us, but it is fine if they don't. I am comfortable with these girls and feel like I will be able to connect with them. Hopefully, this is that accountability that I have been praying for and I will find my motivation.



Please pray for me. I really do want to get past this. I want out of this season of life and I never want to be back here again. This is one season that I won't miss.

God is faithful

Once again this weekend, God has proven to us that He is always faithful to answer our prayers. Friday night we, MSM, hosted The After Party after the Wren/Easley game. Bryan was a bit concerned that things would not turn out so well, mostly due to the weather. Well, it went GREAT!!! We had a great turn out and the students seemed to have a great time. Even officer Roger got in on the karaoke.

This morning, we had around 70 Middle School kids in the service. We have been around 70 or 75 each week so far. Sammy was teaching in the main service today, so Pastor Eddie hung out in the middle school service. We had 8 salvations! Pastor Eddie got to talk with two of them. After the service we had a newcomers luncheon. Several of the families had students who have been coming to youth. All of them made positive comments about the student ministry. It was very encouraging.

I am going to back track a little now.

If you have been reading for the last few weeks, you know that we have been praying for clarity about some decisions we needed to make in reference to our adoption. On Saturday, God answered those prayers. It was such an obvious answer that we couldn't deny it. It has been emotionally draining waiting for this answer and I never expected it to come the way that it did. However, I am very glad that it came and that it is now clear.

Right now, I don't feel like I should share all the details, but I do want to thank you for your prayers. It was a reality that was somewhat hard to take, but it is very clear now that God wants us to continue to wait. Please pray now for the child that was invovled in this situation.

We are looking forward to the 22nd when we will be meeting with the social workers at DSS. Hopefully this will speed the process along a little. Then again, this could be another one of those hurry up and wait experiences. No matter what, God continues to show me that He is still very much in the middle of this and He isn't going anywhere. At least that is one thing I know for sure!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I know it has been a while since my last post. Because it has been a while, the next few posts will be a little random and scattered. I will start with MSM stuff.

Last weeks AMP'd was packed out again. We had a record number of high school students. Bryan is doing a series called "Change we can really believe in." Wednesday night I wanted so badly to stand up and scream out an add on to his lesson. He was talking about respect and what it looks like to respect yourself and others. One thing that he mentioned was that girls can respect themselves in the way that they dress. A example that he gave was not showing cleavage. As he was wrapping up this point, I wanted so badly to scream out, "Keep your hands to yourself."

It is my guess that this is just a teenage thing, but I see so many kids who grope all over each other. Often times, I even see this in the middle of the service. There is one particular girl that I have sat behind or beside numerous times, and she won't keep her hands off of the boy next to her. She touches this guy and rubs on him in ways that only go on in the privacy of my own home. For some reason, teens seem to think that the more you touch someone the more you love them. I will admit, that I touch my husband much more (and of course in different ways) than I touch anyone else. The key word there is HUSBAND. As Bryan would say, I have a license to do that.

It breaks my heart to see that they have no concept of what real love and respect look like. It shows a whole lot more respect and love when you keep your hands to yourself. This makes me think about Taylor and Sara. I have had the blessing of spending time with and talking to both of them privately about their relationship. It only takes about a minute to see and understand how much they truly care about each other. The way that they talk about each other makes it more than obvious that they have the utmost respect for each other.

These two have been together for a few years and the extent of the physical relationship has been hugging. They made a commitment to each other and most importantly to God to keep their relationship pure. Taylor has committed to not kiss a girl until he is engaged to her. What an awesome commitment. This is true respect. Sara knows that he has and is saving himself for her and he knows the same about her. They have no regrets and if God were to put someone else in their lives, they will have no regrets creeping in and damaging the new relationships.

Unlike these two incredible young adults, many of our students do not live in homes where their parents have set this example for them. It is my prayer though, that they will see examples like Taylor and Sara and see how rewarding these choices can be. I am not foolish enough to think that every teen can or will make such firm commitments, but a least, they can learn to set some standards and stick to them. Despite what they seem to think, restraint is true measure of respect.

Youth Ministry is Bittersweet

I just read a new post on Married to A Youth Pastor that I want to share.

Birthing a New Baby:

We have been “birthing” another baby at the Maguire home, one could say. Our church has been building a youth building for the past year or so, and it is finally open! It is bitter sweet for me to be honest. I know it is an amazing opportunity and most youth ministries across the nation do not have the support that we have from our church to invest LOTS of money into its students and a super fun building, with skate park included on our church campus (for real). I love it, and I love how already I can see how it has drawn unconnected students from our community to church that will hopefully become connected to a church family. It is awesome. But I do not love the late nights and long days that it has brought for Jeff. And I do not love that we have gone from one student service on the weekend to three. (Again, please hear my heart that I am excited to see how God is going to use this building and I love students and support my husband). But part of my reality is that I just had a real baby 4 weeks ago and I just wish God’s timing was to open this great thing a few months from now. Doesn’t THAT seem like perfect timing? Do I need to teach God a lesson in “perfect timing” again? I’m just feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the greatness at one time.
There is alway so much great stuff happening in youth ministry. Do you guys ever feel bittersweet about it?


This was my reply:

We, too, opened our new student building last week, so I feel your pain. For the last year I have had even less of my hubby. Even when we are together that is where his mind is. We also had to add more services. This is such an exciting time and I am pumped to see who God is going to bring us and how He is going to move. However, I do desperately want my husband back. With the new building comes new expectations from parents and students, but it didn’t come with more staff. It is still just Bryan to deal with the 200+ students and the programing that their families expect. Boy, ministry is such a blessing and a curse!


First of all, please hear my heart, I LOVE youth ministry and I LOVE Marathon. We are blessed to have a wonderful church family and we are even more blessed to have the opportunity to shape the lives of students. With that comes A LOT of sacrifices, much more than many people realize. It is so hard to find balance... I know that Bryan is called to this job and this church. I know that his heart is to give these students every opportunity to see and experience Christ in a real way. This means a lot of time out of the house and a lot of time away from me. Since we started the process to adopt this has been even more difficult for me. Every time he comes home late, every time he leaves early, I can't help but think how much more difficult that will be for all of us when our little buddy finally arrives.

As I wrote about last week, people are very quick to criticize Bryan and to tell him what he needs to do and what he should be doing. Recently someone even had the nerve to tell him that they are tired too, they spend just as much time at the church as he does. I hate to poo poo on your pity party, but that particular day he arrived at work at 9:00am left at 8:00pm and returned the next morning at 5:30am and stayed until 7:00pm. Two more 10 or 12 hour days followed and that doesn't include the 8 or 9 hours he put in on his day off. The 4 or 5 hours he laid brick that Saturday and the 6 hours on Sunday morning and the 2 hours at a high school Bible study that night.

I wish I could count on two hands the number of parents and students that have asked for more week night programs now that we are in the building. The building is beautiful and offers far more possibilities, but it didn't come with more money or more staff. Bryan wants to offer more. He would be there every night (and he was last week, literally!) if he had the choice. I am so blessed to have a pastor and associate pastor that support us and agree with me that this is not going to happen. I went to them and told them that I refuse to give up any more of my time with my husband. As selfish as that may seem, I don't feel bad and they support me. That is a huge blessing.

If Bryan starts a program, he feels obligated to be there, and right now he would have to be. We reach 200+ students every week and Bryan is the only full time staff. He has a part time administrative assistant and two interns. Unfortunately, the economy is not helping this any. There is no money to hire more people. Without volunteers, we can't do anything. If people really want these things to happen, they are going to have to step up.

Youth ministry is bittersweet, but there has to be some balance, and right now I am the voice of balance for my husband. Call me selfish if you will, but I love my husband and I will protect my time with him!

The Garage + AMP'd= Success!

Our first AMP'd in The Garage was last night. I think it is safe to say that it was a success! This was our first HS only service. We weren't really sure what to expect. We put out 200 chairs (max. capacity is a little over 400) because our normal Wednesday night crowd is about 220 with MS and HS. We had 234...you read that correctly 234 and only 6 or 7 of those were Middle Schoolers. We ran out of chairs and the adults were lining the walls. It was incredible! There were 18 first time guests and many students who had not been with us in a while. Bryan even let the band do a scream-o song to celebrate. I am not a fan, but the kids loved it and this is the only time that he has let them do it. I don't think (at least I hope not) that this will be a regular thing.

We weren't without a little drama, but that is where Officer Justin comes in handy. He cut that off quickly and things went smoothly from that point on. It seems crazy to have an officer at church, but he has helped us out and dissolved many situations quickly. Anytime you put a few hundred teenagers together you can never be too careful. It also takes some pressure off of our volunteers, because they know that he is there as a resource if they ever feel like something is more than they can deal with. The kids like him and he is good with our students. They seem to have a mutual respect for each other.

We do have one problem that keeps coming up over and over again. Maybe someone out there will have some suggestions. Every week we have kids that get dropped off and they have made no plan for how to get home. They seem to expect that one of the volunteers will take them home. One particular girl lives about 20 minutes away and is not close to (or even in the same direction) as any of our volunteers. After the same volunteer has taken her home every week for a month or more, the volunteer declined last night. The girl and her friend made no attempt to find another option. Both of them have cell phones. Justin did not offer them a ride and rightfully so. After they were the only kids left for a good 20 or 30 minutes, they asked Bryan to take them home.

I don't know about your area, but here IF you can find gas, it is not cheap. Again, that is IF you can find a station that actually has gas. On top of that, the church has a strict policy that staff members are not to transport people of the opposite sex without their spouse or another staff member. Since we don't ride together this wouldn't work. I don't know what finally happened, but the other kids had been gone an hour by the time these kids finally got a ride. We don't really know how to handle this, because we want the kids to come, but the church does not pay for gas for transporting kids. The only vehicle the church owns is a school bus. None of our volunteers is licensed to drive this bus and of course, I go back to the gas issue. Any suggestions?

Beware of the bear

This may totally be a woman thing, but have you ever gone into Mama Bear mode? That is when you immediately jump on the defensive to protect someone you care about who is being attacked. This seems to be happening to me a lot lately.

For example, two years ago on mission trip there was a woman serving with another church who was extremely unpleasant. She had a sour look on her face the whole week. Several times she gave dirty looks to our students and made smart comments. One afternoon at lunch she went over the line and began to fuss at a group of our students. I was standing behind her the whole time and her complaints were completely unfounded. I went crazy! I wanted to let her have it. Those are my kids and they didn't deserve a moment of her hassling. It was all I could do to hold myself back from telling her off.

Almost immediately, I ran to Bryan and told him that he had better address it before I had a chance to. No matter how crazy my kids may get or how badly they might get on my nerves sometimes, they are mine and you better leave them alone. Don't get me wrong, I would have been the first one to correct them if they had been out of line. I don't have much tolerance for that.

Lately, attacks have been coming left and right. (I am well aware that we have ruffled Satan's feathers with all the progress that is being made in our student ministry.) I know that Bryan is a big boy, but that doesn't stop me from going into Mama Bear mode. There have been many personal attacks made on him and his methods of ministry. No, things aren't always the way they could be and they are not always the way that we want them to be, but he does the best he can. It infuriates me when people accuse him of not caring and not doing his part. No one sits at my house and listens to the hours he talks on the phone with students, parents, volunteers, and contractors. No one sits with him as he cries over the hurts that our students face. No one else puts aside everything in their life to deal with the newest crisis being faced by a student or family.

My husband puts his heart and soul into this ministry 24 hours a day. He never turns work off. He never steps away completely from the needs of his ministry. Yes, that is very frustrating at times, but I understand his heart. When my limited time with my husband is interrupted by phones calls from disgruntled people, I can't help but get angry.

Bryan is a worrier. He takes every comment and complaint to heart. It makes me so angry when he comes home and he can't get past that attacking conversation. This sends me into Mama Bear mode and I want to have my turn at the offender. I can take a lot when the attack is aimed at me, but back off when it comes to those I love.

I think this is the motherly instinct in me. It is a protective mechanism. This is one more thing that God is using to teach me about control. I can't be in control of everything and I have to use self control. This is a tough one for me. I am working on it, but in the mean time...BEWARE OF THE BEAR!

The Garage

Here are the long awaited photos of the Garage. Sorry, I had to wait until I had access to high speed Internet. (yes we still live in the dark ages!)

There are more pictures in my facebook album if you are interested.

Opening Day

After 3 long years of waiting on God's perfect timing, the day is finally here. The grand opening of the Garage is tonight. The last couple of weeks have been long, especially the last couple of days. I joined the guys on Thursday and spent most of my day working in the Garage. Yesterday Bryan and I arrived at 9:30 am and left at 11:00pm. It was a really long day, but the place looked great when we left.

This is an exciting time for our student ministry! The Garage represents the love and commitment of many many people. Many people have given their time and money over the last three years to make this a reality. They believe with us, that this can be a tool to get students in the door. Once they are inside, it gives us the opportunity to show them the love of Christ and change their lives forever.

Tonight's open house is from 5-7 and we will be serving ice cream. Come and check it out! Tomorrow we will have folks hanging out and answering questions during the services. Our first official service in the Garage will be Wednesday. AMP'd is now for High School students only and begins at 7:07pm. Next Sunday will be our first Ignition service for Middle School students at 11:30. Hope to see you then!

I will add some pictures later today. My dial-up connection makes this next to impossible.

Weekend Review

We really enjoyed our quick trip to Knoxville. It was good to get away and hanging out with Taylor and Sara was great. If you are Bryan's friend on Facebook, you will see some of the foolishness that went on. We were welcomed home on a somber note though. While we were gone, my Grandma was visiting our cousins in NC as one of them is in the hospital. Yesterday, they took him, Harder, off the ventilator. As of this morning he was still holding his own. Harder is in his 70's or 80's. We will miss him, but we don't want him to suffer.

Last night I found out that Tanner Odum, a friend from high school, was killed in a car accident. If you are in the upstate, you may recognize him as the owner of Big O Dodge. This broke my heart as his dad was killed in a motorcycle accident just a few years ago. Please pray for Bev, Tanner's mom, as this has to be so hard. I can't imagine what she is dealing with. I know that Bev loves the Lord and He is walking with her through this. Better yet, He is carrying her through.

On a lighter note, in preparing to leave for the weekend, I did some house cleaning. I made good use of the time by listening to a few podcasts. There were a couple of adoption ones that were well worth checking out. Thinking of Adopting and the Foster Parenting Podcast with Tim & Wendy. They were fairly short ones, so go on Itunes and check it out. The Foster Parenting on is a couple talking about their personal experiences with their soon to be adopted children. They are Christians, and it is very practical.

Also, The Simply Youth Ministry Podcasts are great. I personally like the ones with Doug & Kathy Fields where they talk about youth ministry and Marriage. It is very honest and to the point. Check it out!

Memphis Photos

Here is a link to my photos from Memphis. Check out our students in action!


http://picasaweb.google.com/atouchofcrystal/REACH08

You can also see pictures from SURGE on this site.

Enjoy!

Memphis: The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly (Part 3)

So far, I have given you a break down of our daily schedule and told you a little about the hurdles some of our students faced. I've told you about our bad Monday morning with the broken window. I've told you about the ugly heat we faced and the ugly stereotypes some of our kids had. So now for the good (there is so much, where do I start!).

Let's start with a funny thing... One morning we were at Brinkley Heights preparing for send off and a family them some tricks. Labardo, the little boy, flips over onto his hands and starts walking. He challenged Jon, one of our students, to walk on his hands also. Jon flipped over onto his hands and walked about a foot before he fell over. Labardo immediately pointed right in Jon's face and said, "ha ha, you suck!" Everyone around was laughing hysterically. Jon is our biggest jokester, so this was classic. He is usually the one laughing at everybody else. Many funny things were said over the course of the week, but I can't remember them all. One thing that we can always count on is a lot of laughter with our students.

One afternoon we were driving and the girls started talking about their families. We had a girl van and a boy bus. No we don't think it is bad for them to mix, but we learned last year, that it is a lot easier to keep them focused this way. It proved to be a great idea. This group was comprised of about half of our 30-40 core students. We spend a good bit of time with these kids and thought we knew a lot about them. I had no idea the struggles these girls were facing at home. Of the 5 one has divorced parents, one has parents getting divorced (we knew about both of these), one has a parent that is often absent and struggles with drugs, one has parents with huge financial issues who are on the verge of divorce, and the other has a parent with anger issues and they have been on the verge of divorce also. We had no clue. I truly believe that these girls would never have shared this in a larger group or in front of the boys. This proved to me, that God was allowing them to bond on this trip.

We also saw students abandon their fears and embrace Christ. He really moved in these students and taught them a lot about themselves and loving others. Before we left, we asked the kids to write about what they experienced and learned. Here are some things that they had to say:

So I came to Street Reach as someone who looked down on poverty and blacks. I have a problem with racism and knew that we were working with little kids. ... I knew I had a problem and knew that it was wrong. After the trip I learned not to look down on people who have nothing, no one, and no money. ...Learned that race should not matter. -17 y/o male

...I first saw Courtney on Tuesday. ...We played together all day and as I walked her home, on my shoulders of course, she said a sentence to me that I will never forget, "This is the best day of my life." -16 y/o girl

So, there you have it...The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly. We, and our students, can't wait for Street Reach 09!

Memphis: The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly (Part 2)

Monday was our first day on the site. Since only 5 of our students were returners, most of the kids had no idea what to expect. I think that it is safe to say that they were a little nervous. After about 15 minutes of set up, we saw our students coming around the corner with little ones on their backs, their shoulders (necks), and in their arms. It took 10 or 15 minutes to get all the children registered and then we got started.

Our students immediately jumped in and got started. They were all playing with children, talking to them, and teaching them. It looked so natural for them all. We were really proud of them! That busted window could have put a damper on the day, but we totally knew it was just a sign of better (incredible) things to come.

During our worship time that night Jason, the director of Street Reach, asked the teams to share how they saw God move that day. One of our girls blew me away. She shared that she was afraid of kids and was hesitant to even be there. She didn't know how to interact with them and thought they would pull her hair,etc. All day long, she had kids surrounding her. She smiled the whole time that she played with them and helped them with their crafts. Watching her on the site, you would have thought that she loved kids and worked with them everyday.

Like I said yesterday, most of our students have very little contact with people of other ethnicities. Unfortunately, this perpetuates stereotypical views of African Americans that we Southerners have ignorantly held onto for years. Our church strives to Love All, Serve All and this is the attitude that we try to pass on to our students. Sometimes I am so naive to the fact that racism exists in the people around me. I assume that people have the same view of others that I do. During share time, one of our boys shared that he had always had a problem with African Americans. (It didn't come out quite the way he meant it, and he offended one of the staff members.) Throughout the week, several of the students shared that they were afraid they weren't prepared and were worried about being effective.

We had some kids on the site that were tough to love. Many of the older kids have learned that putting on a tough and street wise front makes them untouchable. It can be intimidating. These kids are surrounded by poverty, gangs, and crime. The toughest guy wins in their world, so it is often hard to get close enough to really love on them. Bryan and Eric (our other adult male) took on the challenge of loving them. They worked to build relationships with them and be Jesus to these kids. One kid in particular, DeAngelo, seems to be the leader of the pack. He doesn't look intimidating, but he can take on the persona of a bully really quickly.

It is funny how everyone bonds with a particular child almost immediately. Bryan bonded with DeAngelo and his goal was to keep DeAngelo there all week and show him how to use his influence to be a positive role model.

There is plenty more to share, so come back tomorrow!

Memphis: The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly (Part 1)

Where do I even start? Have you ever been somewhere that no matter how many times you visit you always leave changed? This was my fourth visit to Memphis and my fourth life changing experience in Memphis. God never fails to show up and amaze me.

I was a bit frustrated as we prepared for the trip. Some of our students weren't prepared and they didn't seem focused. Bryan was also feeling this way. We loaded up on Sunday morning at 6 am. We finally made it to Memphis around 4 pm their time, making it an 11 hour trip. After dinner and orientation, Bryan kept our kids aside and laid it out for them. He hates those hard talks, but realizes that they are necessary with teenagers sometimes.

To carry on our theme from SURGE, we awoke Monday morning to a bus with busted glass. God proved to us at SURGE that these things are nothing more than Satan's feeble attempts at stopping His mighty moving in our students. Needless to say, things got off to a slow start, but we didn't let it stop us and not a single kid complained or freaked out (our kids have freaking out mastered!).

Each morning we went to our site (Johnson Ave) in the roughest and poorest neighborhood in inner city Memphis. We spent several hours at the site running backyard bible clubs. We would then go to Brinkley Heights for lunch and then load up for afternoon projects in the community. In the evenings we had dinner at Leawood with the Street Reach staff and the 2 other groups serving. After dinner was worship and share time (this strikes fear in MSM leaders; our kids love to hog the share time) followed by team meetings.

Many/Most of our students have had very little contact with children unlike themselves (middle class and white), so working in a neighborhood that is 100% African American and well below the poverty line was a first for most of them. It was also tough to ask guitar playing, video game loving teenagers to spend 4 to 6 hours of their day working outside in 106 degree temperatures with 100% humidity. On top of that, they constantly had kids on their backs or "on yo neck".

Despite the less than ideal conditions, God moved and I can't wait to share it with you. For the sake of time and the fact that I am at work, I will continue this tomorrow. So, stay tuned!

He's coming home!

In 45 minutes my husband will be leaving Pigeon Forge to return home, YEAH!!! This is the longest he has ever left me for. I think that it is safe to say that this will be the last time as well. I shared all my drama from Tuesday and yesterday I got a call from Bryan. He had been bitten/stung again. He was nervous and upset. I think that it really freaked him out. He called the doctor, followed her instructions, and he is ok. He was really scared though.

Two weeks of camp back to back is out! No more! They should be returning to Marathon by 1:00. Guess where I will be at 1:00.