Thanks for the junk!

In The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren says that God never wastes a hurt. As ironic as it sounds I become more and more thankful for this everyday.

Growing up I had a fairly rough home life. I had to grow up really quickly and be my own parent most of the time. Unfortunately, some of the adults in my life didn't know how to be adults and made many bad decisions of which I often felt the consequences.

On the outside it looked like I had it all together. I was a happy kid and teenager, never rebellious or out of control. My extended family made sure that I had nice clothes, a car, a job, and a house to sleep in. They also made every effort to let me participate in the activities that my friends did (church camp, dance classes and competitions, sports). Most people never knew how poor we really were and what exactly went on at home. For the most part, I blended in at my affluent high school.

Last night Bryan called me just before I got home and asked how far away I was. About a mile from home, I pulled in the driveway just minutes before one of our students. The student had called Bryan earlier upset and needing to talk to someone. Not wanting to leave any room for question or speculation, he wanted to make sure that I was there too.

Wow, I blown away to hear the student's story. I had no idea what was going on in this kids life. Bryan was aware of the situation and had been talking with the student for a while about things. This kid is a strong leader in our group, well put together, good at school, sold out to Christ, and loves to serve. A popular kid, you would never guess what was going on behind that smile and sweet disposition.

My heart broke and I began to cry (I am not a crier). I couldn't help but think of my own teenage years. So many of the things going on were similar to situations I had dealt with in my own life and family as a high school and college student. Anyone would feel sorry for this kid, but I could completely understand what was going on inside. I had been there. Though it was probably 15 years ago when I dealt with those issues, it felt like it was happening all over again.

We didn't have a lot of answers, but we prayed and I let the student in on some of what I had been through. If nothing else, the student left knowing that they had found someone who would listen, understand, and help however possible.

God reminded me of that chapter from The Purpose Driven Life and that all those hurts in my life weren't a waste. You can't truly understand someone until you've been there. He also reminded me of what a huge responsibility we have as parents. Every decision we make not only affects us, but our children also. Exodus 34:6-7 makes it clear that our families will have to pay for our choices.

Thank you God that you don't waste those experiences. I couldn't be who I am today without those moments and I wouldn't have the opportunity to love teenagers with those hurts. It seems odd to be thankful for the junk in your life, but I wouldn't change one thing. Thanks for the junk!